Best Jokes

Me: Could you pass me the Washington Shire sauce?

Her: The what?

Me: The Westminster Shore sauce.

Her: Are you feeling alright?

Me: The Warcaster Shiner sauce... you know the one I mean!

A married couple were vacationing in Hawaii and disagreed on the correct pronunciation of the state name. He said it was Hawaii and his wife said it was Havaii.

They stopped a man on the street to ask his opinion. He said the correct pronunciation was Havaii. The man's wife was delighted and thanked the man.

The man said, "You're velcome."

Why wouldn't the dentist display his awards?

He wanted to prevent plaque buildup.

Max Factor mascara makes eyelashes appear three times longer...

They should make condoms.