Best Jokes

What should you do if you see a spaceman?

You should park, man.

A little boy asked his grandmother what year she was born.

She told him she was born in 1935.

"Wow!" the boy exclaimed. "If you were a baseball card, you'd be worth lots of money!"

How do you identify a bald eagle?

All his feathers are combed over to one side.

- You wake up face down on the pavement.

- You jump out of bed in the morning and miss the floor.

- You turn on the morning news, and they're showing emergency routes out of your city.

- Your bar of Ivory soap sinks.

- You put both contact lenses in the same eye.

- The bird singing outside your window is a vulture.

- Your horn gets stuck when you're following a group of Hell's Angels on the freeway.