Latest Jokes

$50.00 won 5 votes

As a kid I wanted to be an astronaut...

But my parents always said, "The sky's the limit!"

5 votes

Joke Won 1st Place won $50.00
posted by "barber7796" |
2 votes

My husband told me that I am one of the eight wonders of the world...

I warned him not to let me catch him with any of the other seven!!!

2 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "Raul Bajarias" |
3 votes
 

A tourist parked his car in downtown Washington, D.C. He said to a man standing near the curb, "Listen, I'm going to be only a couple of minutes. Would you watch my car while I run into this store?"

"What?" the man huffed. "Do you realize that I am a member of the United States Congress?"

"Well, no," the tourist said, "I didn't realize that. But it's all right. I'll trust you anyway."

3 votes

posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
$9.00 won 4 votes

Jones came into the office an hour late for the third time in one week and found the boss waiting for him.

"What's the story this time, Jones?" he asked sarcastically. "Let's hear a good excuse for a change."

Jones sighed, "Everything went wrong this morning, Boss. My wife decided to drive me to the station. She got ready in ten minutes, but then the drawbridge got stuck. Rather than let you down, I swam across the river, as you can see my suit is still damp, ran out to the airport, got a ride on Mr. Gregson's helicopter, landed on top of his skyscraper, and ran over here."

"You'll have to do better than that, Jones," said the boss, obviously disappointed. "No woman can get ready in ten minutes."

4 votes

CATEGORY Business Jokes
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "HENNE" |