Latest Jokes

3 votes
 

To the person who stole my glasses...

I will find you, I have contacts!

3 votes

CATEGORY Puns
posted by "Tristan Cook" |
1 votes
 

An engineer, a physicist, a mathematician, and a mystic were asked to name the greatest invention of all times. The engineer chose fire, which gave humanity power over matter.

The physicist chose the wheel, which gave humanity the power over space. The mathematician chose the alphabet, which gave humanity power over symbols. The mystic chose the thermos bottle.

"Why a thermos bottle?" the others asked.

"Because the thermos keeps hot liquids hot in winter and cold liquids cold in summer."

"Yes -- so what?"

"Think about it," said the mystic reverently. "That little bottle -- how does it know?"

1 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "wadejagz" |
1 votes

What do you get when you cross a banana with a red silk dress?

A pink slip.

1 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
2 votes

In the world of flies, a young fly needed a heart transplant. After being taken to surgery, the fly anesthesiologist put the young fly to sleep.

The fly doctor assistant cut open the young fly’s chest. He then announced to the fly heart doctor, "Your fly is open."

The heart doctor blushed.

2 votes

posted by "Pillowpack" |