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2 votes
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Three phrases commonly seen around Christmas time are...

Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men, and Batteries Not Included!

2 votes

posted by "wadejagz" |
$50.00 won 3 votes

Scott: "When I grow up, I'm going to run for Congress!"

Billy: "Gee, it's a long way to Washington, Scott, maybe you should start running now."

3 votes

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posted by "iqannnylirod" |
2 votes
 

A man died and arrived at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter greets him and says, "Welcome. Come walk with me and I'll show you where you'll be staying."

As they're walking along the path he notices clocks on the Golden Fence of Heaven. He asks St. Peter, "What are all those clocks for?"

St. Peter replies, "They’re clocks for every person in the world. They click once for each time you lie."

By the time they reach where the man is staying, he asks out of curiosity, "I didn't see any politicians’ clocks. Where are they kept?"

St. Peter calmly replies, "People here use them as fans."

2 votes

posted by "HENNE" |
3 votes

Dad: "Johnny, go to bed. You're dozing off on the couch..."

Little Johnny (opening his eyes): "No dad, I'm not dozing... I'm just blinking reaaaally sloooowly."

3 votes

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posted by "SirD" |