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Favorite this joke It was Grandpa Jones' 100th birthday and he was still in perfect health. At his birthday party he was asked how he managed to live so long and stay so fit.
He explained, "I put my long life down to spending so much time outdoors. I've been in the open air, day after day, rain or shine, for the last 75th years."
"How do you manage to keep up such a rigorous fitness regime?" they asked.
"It's simple," he said. "When I married my wife 75 years ago, we both made a solemn pledge. We agreed that whenever we had a fight, whoever was proved wrong would go outside and take a long walk."
A man visits his doctor and complains that he feels like he has 5 legs.
The doctor asks him how do his pants fit?
The man replies, "Like a glove!"
Customer: Waiter, I’m hungry. Please bring me a mashed potato sandwich on rye.
Waiter: What are you saying? Only an idiot would order mashed potatoes on rye bread.
Customer: You’re right. Make it on whole wheat toast.
One day, I saw a friend of mine crying over a bag of chips.
I asked him what's wrong and he said that he was just following the instruction written on the bag of chips.
"Tear here to open."
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