Latest Jokes

$50.00 won 4 votes

When I was a kid, I wanted to play the guitar badly.

And after years of hard work, practice and dedication, I can now play the guitar... badly.

4 votes

CATEGORY Puns
Joke Won 1st Place won $50.00
posted by "Danny Jackson" |
$25.00 won 2 votes

A local lumberyard was having an open house, and my mother really wanted to go. Dad, though, had no interest.

After badgering him with no luck, she finally said, “If you don’t go, I’ll be the only woman there.”

Dad shrugged. “If I go, you’ll still be the only woman there.”

2 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
Joke Won 2nd Place won $25.00
posted by "Jean Kerr" |
$15.00 won 2 votes

Dear Customer Service,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slowdown in the performance of the flower and jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly under the Boyfriend 5.0 system.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9, and installed undesirable programs such as NFL 7.4, NBA 3.2 and NHL 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 also no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,

Desperate

2 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 3rd Place won $15.00
posted by "merk" |
$12.00 won 1 votes

A man and his wife were lying in bed the other night when he noticed she had bought a new book entitled, "What 20 Million American Women Want."

He grabbed the book out of her hands and started thumbing through the pages.

His wife was a little annoyed. "Hey, what do you think you're doing?"

He calmly replied, "I just wanted to see if they spelled my name right."

1 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
Joke Won 4th Place won $12.00
posted by "wadejagz" |