"Doctor, doctor, you have to help me out!"
"Certainly, not a problem. Which way did you come in?"
"Doctor, doctor, I'm addicted to brake fluid!"
"That is nonsense," begins the doctor, "You can stop anytime."
Patient: "Doctor, can you tell me what are your fees?"
Doctor: "For the 1st visit I charge $2000 and the 2nd visit is free."
[The patient then decided to lie.]
Patient: "Doctor, this is my second visit."
Doctor: "In that case, please continue taking the medicines that I had prescribed on your first visit."
I said to my wife, "I need to call the doctor today."
"Which doctor?" she asked.
"No, the regular kind."