If you can start the day without caffeine or pills,
If you can be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,
If you can resist complaining and telling people your troubles,
If you can eat the same food everyday and be grateful for it,
If you can understand when loved ones are too busy to give you time,
If you can overlook when people take things out on you when,
If you can take criticism and blame without resentment,
If you can face the world without lies and deceit,
If you can conquer tension without medical help,
If you can relax without liquor,
If you can sleep without the aid of drugs,
THEN YOU MUST BE THE FAMILY DOG!!!
Father in a conversation with a neighbor...
First son: Degree in Economics
Second son: MBA
Third son: PhD
Fourth son: Thief
Neighbor: Why can't you throw the fourth son out of your house?
Father: He is the only one earning money. The rest are unemployed.
The only contest I ever won in my family was eating the most paint chips!
Most loving mothers change many smelly diapers. Every day.
Yet, they absolutely lose it when their husbands pass gas.
Go figure.