A man brings his best buddy home for dinner unannounced at 6:30PM after work.
His wife screams at him while his friend sits and listens in.
"My hair and makeup are not done, the house is a mess, the dishes are not done, I am still in my pajamas and I can't be bothered with cooking tonight! Why the heck did you bring him home?"
Calmly the husband replies, "Because he's thinking of getting married and I promised him a demo."
A young man excitedly tells his mother he’s fallen in love and that he is going to get married.
He says, “Just for fun, Ma, I’m going to bring over 3 girls and you try and guess which one I’m going to marry.”
The mother agrees.
The next day, he brings three women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while. He then says, “Okay Ma, guess which one I’m going to marry.”
She immediately replies, “The one on the right.”
“That’s amazing, Ma. You’re right. How did you know?”
The mother replies, “I don’t like her."
A boy's grandma doesn't like eating her medicine. So the boy goes to the doctor and asked what he can do. The doctor tells him a trick. Put the medicine in the middle of some sweets!
So the boy buys some sweets and puts medicine in them. When he gets home he give them to Grandma to eat. After eating her sweets the Grandson told his Grandma, “I am very happy to see that you have eaten all the sweets.”
Grandma replied, “Yes I ate all my sweets but I didn’t like the seeds inside them so I removed them before eating my sweets.”
Son: Dad, I want to get married.
Father: First, tell me you're sorry.
Son: For what?
Father: Say sorry.
Son: But for what ? What did I do?
Father: Just say sorry.
Son: But...what have i done wrong ?
Father: Say sorry!
Father: Say sorry!!
Son: Please, just tell me why?
Father: Say sorry!!!
Son: OK, Dad...i'm sorry!
Father: There ! You're finished training. When you learn to say sorry for no reason at all, then you're ready to get married!