Best Jokes

$50.00 won 7 votes

Two cats are having a swimming race. One is called “One Two Three”, the other “Un Deux Trois”.

Which cat won?

“One Two Three” because “Un Deux Trois” cat sank.

7 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
Joke Won 1st Place won $50.00
posted by "Gegg Smith" |
$15.00 won 7 votes

In San Diego to work with military linguists, my colleague and I checked into a hotel and ordered a 5 a.m. wake-up call. The next morning, the phone didn’t ring until 5:30.

“You were supposed to call us at 5 a.m.!” I admonished the desk clerk on the other end of the line. “What if I had to close a ­million-dollar contract this morning? Your oversight would have cost me the deal!”

“Sir,” he said calmly, “if you had to close that type of deal, I doubt you’d be staying in this type of hotel.”

7 votes

CATEGORY Money Jokes
Joke Won 3rd Place won $15.00
posted by "Ryan Faidley" |
$12.00 won 7 votes

"You seem to have more than the average share of intelligence for a man of your background," sneered the lawyer at a witness on the stand.

"If I wasn't under oath, I'd return the compliment," replied the witness.

7 votes

CATEGORY Lawyer Jokes
Joke Won 4th Place won $12.00
posted by "maryjones" |
$25.00 won 7 votes

The morning before Christmas Adam arose and said, "It's Christmas, Eve."

7 votes

Joke Won 2nd Place won $25.00
posted by "barber7796" |