Best Jokes

$9.00 won 7 votes

Two windmills are in a field. One asks, "What kind of music do you like?"

The other one says, "Well, I’m a big metal fan."

7 votes

CATEGORY Puns
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "Gegg Smith" |
$50.00 won 7 votes

I hope Elon Musk never gets into a scandal...

Elon-gate would be really drawn out.

7 votes

CATEGORY Puns
Joke Won 1st Place won $50.00
posted by "Gegg Smith" |
$10.00 won 7 votes
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I phoned my work this morning and said, “Sorry boss, I can’t come in today, I have a wee cough.”

He said, “You have a wee cough?”

I said, “Really? Thanks boss, I could use a week off!"

7 votes

CATEGORY Work Jokes
Joke Won 5th Place won $10.00
posted by "Gegg Smith" |
$9.00 won 7 votes

A man went to his doctor complaining about terrible neck pains, throbbing headaches and dizzy spells. The doctor examined him and said, “I’m afraid I have some bad news for you. You have only six months to live.”

The doomed man decided he would spend his remaining time on earth enjoying himself. He told his boss what he thought of him and quit his job. Then he took all his money out of the bank and bought a sports coat, 10 new suits, and 15 pairs of new shoes.

Then he went to get himself a dozen tailored shirts. He went to the finest shirt shop he could find. The tailor measured and wrote down 16 neck.

“Wait a moment,” the man interrupted. “I always wear a size 14 neck, and that’s what I want.”

“I’ll be glad to do it for you, sir,” the tailor replied. However, if you wear a size 14 neck your going to get terrible neck pains, throbbing headaches and dizzy spells.”

7 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "Karen Carpenter Fan" |