The teacher was giving her class of seven-year-olds a nature history lesson.
"Worker ants," she told them, "can carry pieces of food five times their own weight. What do you conclude from that?"
One child was ready with the answer, "They don't have a union?"
Police officer talks to a driver: "Your tail light is broken, your tires must be changed, and your bumper hangs halfway down. That will be 300 dollars!!"
Driver: "Alright, go ahead and do it. They want twice as much as that at the garage."