What does one wildebeest say to another wildebeest say at the beginning of each year?
“Happy Gnu Year!”
A horse walks into a bar...
... the trainer says, "Next time, jump!"
A duck is standing next to a busy road, cars zooming past while he waits for a break in traffic.
A chicken walks up to him and says, "Don't do it, man. You'll never hear the end of it."
"I usually meet my girlfriend at 12:59."
"Why is that?"
"Because I like that one to one time.”