Latest Jokes

A nearsighted minister glanced at the note that Mrs. Jones had sent to him by an usher. The note read: "Bill Jones having gone to sea, his wife desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety."

Failing to observe the punctuation, he startled his audience by announcing: "Bill Jones, having gone to see his wife, desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety."

The pastor was greeting folks at the door after the service. A woman said, “Father, that was a good sermon.”

The priest replied, “Oh, I have to give the credit to the Holy Spirit.”

“It wasn’t THAT good!” she said.

Waiter: "Tea or coffee, gentlemen?"

1st customer: "I'll have tea."

2nd customer: "Me, too - and please make sure the glass is clean."

(The waiter exits, returns.)

Waiter: "Two teas. Who asked for the clean glass?"