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Favorite this joke I know a guy who works as a custodian and gardener at a nearby apartment building, and sometimes I earn a couple extra bucks by lending him a hand when he's got a particularly big workload.
He's got some bad habits, though. He asked me if he wanted to share a joint while we were on a break.
I declined. I didn't want to deal with a high maintenance guy.
A customer sat down at a table in a smart restaurant and tied a napkin around his neck. The scandalized manager called a waiter and instructed him, "Try to make him understand, as tactfully as possible, that that's not done."
Said the thoughtful waiter to the customer: "Pardon me, sir, shave or haircut?"
I was in a taxi today and the driver said, "I love my job. I'm my own boss. Nobody tells me what to do."
Then I said: "Turn left here."
Someone asked me to name two structures that hold water.
I was like well, damn.
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