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Favorite this joke When I was young I could watch basketball and even soccer, I could follow all the moves.
But I slowed down a bit and switched to American football since there were many seconds between plays.
But that caught up with me so I switched to baseball since there could be several minutes between plays.
But then I started going to sleep between the plays and lost whole innings.
What to do?
I finally settled on solitaire. If I fall asleep between drawing cards, the game is the same when I wake up.
Muggins: "Yes, I'm living out in the country now. It certainly has it inconveniences."
Buggins: "What do you miss most?"
Muggins: "The last train home at night."
My friends and I were doing Tequila shooters last night and decided to take a cab to the Standup Comedy Club for open mic night.
My friends encouraged me to get up on the stage and give it a try so I did. The people were in hysterics, everyone in the place was cracking up making sure to point me out to their friends.
When I got up this morning things were a bit hazy but I do remember how I brought the house down last night at the comedy club. A sense of pride was coming over me until my friend just called and told me we had reservations for the comedy club tonight.
I told him we went there last night and he laughed. He said they were booked last night so all of us went over to that new Karaoke place across town.
Two hitmen are walking together deep into a scary woodland.
The first hitman says, “I don’t mind admitting I feel a little afraid!”
The second hitman replies,” How do you think I feel, I have to walk back alone!”
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