Best Jokes

I'm done with dating sites.

Now focused on pizza delivery guys.

Before I even meet them, I know they have a job, car, and a pizza.

Today I made my first money as a Computer Programmer.

I sold my laptop.

I tried to pay cash at the plagiarism store.

But they only take credit.

When I was in college, I was really into this girl named Greta, but I was shy back then and not at all assertive. The girl and two of her friends were going to a nerdy Halloween party and decided to go as the first digits of pi (3.14).

They needed someone to be the decimal, and I volunteered thinking it would give me a chance to talk to Greta. I was really excited until I got there and realized that she was the 4, which meant there was someone between us all night. I was miserable, barely spoke to anyone, and went home alone.

Thing is, the whole reason I went to the party was that I really thought she was the one.