Best Jokes

My husband works as a service technician for a large exterminating company. One of the rules of the company is that he has to confirm each appointment by phone the night before his service call to that household.

One evening he made such a call, and when a man answered the phone, he said, "Hi, this is Gary from A to Z Pest Control Company. Your wife phoned us."

There was a long silence, and then my husband heard the man on the other end say, "Honey, it's for you... someone wants to talk to you about your relatives."

There was this man who muttered a few words in the church and found himself married...

A year later he muttered something in his sleep and found himself divorced.

This is me, when asked by my parents what my final exam grades were....

"I don't know what more they want? They give me questions I don't know, I give them answers they don't know."

If you could drive the speed of light, would your head lights still work?l?!