Best Jokes

1 votes

If one of your humans is engaged in some close activity and the other is idle, stay with the busy one. This is called "helping", otherwise known as "hampering." Following are the rules for "hampering":

1. When supervising cooking, sit just behind the left heel of the cook. You cannot be seen and thereby stand a better chance of being stepped on and then picked up and comforted. It's even funnier when they try to avoid stepping on you and fall into a counter or table.

2. For book readers, get in close under the chin, between eyes and book, unless you can lie across the book itself.

3. For paperwork, lie on the work in the most appropriate manner so as to obscure as much of the work or at least the most important part. Pretend to doze, but every so often reach out and slap the pencil or pen. The worker may try to distract you; ignore it. Remember, the aim is to hamper work.

4. When a human is holding the newspaper in front of him/her, be sure to jump on the back of the paper.

1 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "merk" |
$12.00 won 1 votes

A man went to his doctor.

When the doctor entered the examining room, the man cried, “My hair is falling out! Can you give me something to keep it in?”

“Of course,” said the doctor reassuringly, and he handed the man a small box. “Will this be big enough?”

1 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
1 votes

Joe: Hi, Mo. What have you been doing lately?

Mo: I went to a lecture about corn last night.

Joe: Was it interesting?

Mo: Yeah, I was all ears!

1 votes

posted by "Magenta Sunrise" |
1 votes

My job is in the aerospace industry, and it's always been a challenge to explain what kind of work I do.

At one gathering, I tried several unsuccessful attempted explanations before deciding to be as generic as possible. When the subject came up while I was talking with a group of guys, I replied simply, "Defense contractor."

The men nodded, and as the conversation went on, I silently declared victory to myself. Then, one of them turned to me and asked, "So, what do you put up mainly? Chain-link?"

1 votes

CATEGORY Business Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |