A class goes on school field trip to a museum. A little boy breaks a vase then reads about it's history. He pretend it never happened. The school went on with the field trip until security stopped the boy and confronted him.
The teacher asks the boy, "Why didn't you tell someone you broke the vase?"
The boy replies, "I didn't think it would matter, it said it was priceless,"
What did the snowman say when he felt he was misunderstood?
Did you get my drift?
I asked my friend Jim about our mutual friend Inge. She seemed down and depressed.
Jim answered, "She used to be the 'Bell of the Ball'. But nobody ever tolled her!"
Man walks into the barbershop, sits down in the chair and the barber asks, "How do you want your haircut?"
The man says, " I would like the sideburns one high and one low, a few long hairs sticking out of the back and a few chunks on the side and top."
The barber looks puzzled and says, "I'm not sure I can do that."
The customer says, "Why not, you did it that way last time."