Under new management...
See spouse for details!
My dry cleaner very generously provides a stack of free newspapers for his customers.
As I took my copy, I told him, "I hope the business grows enough to offset the cost of the papers."
Oh, don't worry about us," he chuckled. "Nothing dirties clothes more than newsprint."
Why aren't fish allowed to play in an orchestra?
Because you can tune a piano, but you can't tune-a-fish.
The biggest and roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference...
Apparently he acquired his size from too much pi.