Best Jokes

$8.00 won 5 votes

Two doctors and an HMO manager die and line up together at the Pearly Gates. One doctor steps forward and tells St. Peter, "As a pediatric surgeon, I saved hundreds of children."

St. Peter lets him enter. The next doctor says, "As a psychiatrist, I helped thousands of people live better lives."

St. Peter tells him to go ahead. The last man says, "I was an HMO manager. I got countless families cost-effective health care."

St. Peter replies, "You may enter. But... you can only stay for three days. After that, you got to go!"

5 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
posted by "Adie Peter" |
$5.00 won 5 votes

We are 10 days into self-isolation and it is really upsetting me to witness my wife standing at the living room window gazing aimlessly into space with tears running down her cheeks.

It breaks my heart to see her like this. I have thought very hard about how I can cheer her up. I have even considered letting her in - but rules are rules.

5 votes

posted by "Merkv814" |
$8.00 won 5 votes

“Boss can I have a week off around Christmas?”

“It’s May...”

“Sorry. May I have a week off around Christmas?”

5 votes

posted by "Danny Jackson" |
$10.00 won 5 votes

Today was a really bad day for me...

FIRST, my ex got run over by a bus.

SECOND, I lost my job as a bus driver.

5 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "barber7796" |