Best Jokes

Little Johnny and his younger sister Everleigh were on their very first train ride. They had brought along bananas for lunch. Just as they began to peel them, the train entered a long, dark tunnel.

"Have you eaten your banana yet?" Johnny asked excitedly.

"No," replied Everleigh.

"Well don't touch it then!" Johnny shouted. "I just took a bite and went blind!"

On a recent congressional trip to Switzerland one of the group spoke to a group. There was very little applause. He was followed by a man that spoke to them in their native tongue.

The applause was deafening and everyone in the group cheered as loudly as the best of them. Then, still clapping, he leaned over to the chairman of the meeting, "What did he say?"

"He was interpreting your speech to them," replied the chairman gravely.

You said everything would be back to normal after June!

Ju-Lyed!

A careful shopper in the fish market asked as to the freshness of the fish she was considering.

"Fresh? Why this fish took its last breath just as you entered the market," replied the manager.

The shopper, who had done business here before indicated, "And what a breath it has."