Latest Jokes
Favorite this joke An actress who suffered from an inferiority complex was complaining to her psychiatrist. "I'm a nothing!" she cried. "I can't sing. I can't remember my lines. I can't dance, I can't even act. I really don't belong in show business."
"Why don't you quit?" the doctor asked.
"I can't," moaned the actress. "I'm a Star!"
I dreamt I was drowning in an ocean made out of orange soda last night...
It took me a while to work out it was just a Fanta-sea.
When my 88-year-old mother was called for jury duty, she had to submit to questioning by the opposing lawyers.
"Have you ever dealt with an attorney?" asked the plaintiff's lawyer.
"Yes. I had an attorney write my living trust," she responded.
"And how did that turn out?"
"I don't know," she said. "Ask me again after I go."
Mother and daughter are having a bonding moment.
Daughter: Mommy can you differentiate the words terrible and horrible for me?
Mother: Sure dear. Remember when we went to the beach last week?
Daughter: Yes I remember.
Mother: While swimming, your dad was caught by rip current.
Daughter: Oh, that's terrible!
Mother: That's right.
Daughter: Mommy, what about horrible?
Mother: The wave brought him back to shore.
Free Daily Joke