What do you call a person who takes baby goats?
A Kidnapper!
I hate it when my wife gets mad at me for being lazy.
It’s not like I did anything!
A southern grandmother went with the family to visit Niagara falls.
She decided to order ten hot dogs from the restaurant for the extended family.
When her number was called she was given tea and a hot dog.
She told the lady that she had ordered ten hot dogs.
The lady said, that's what we gave you, tea and a hot dog.
I think my wife has started to show the first signs of Alzheimer's...
She said she can't remember what she ever saw in me.