Two ants were running along the top of a cardboard box as fast as they could.
"Hey!" puffed one ant, "Why are we running so fast?"
"Can't you read?" replied the other. "It says tear along the dotted line!"
Two cartons of yogurt walk into a bar. The bartender, who was a tub of cottage cheese, says to them, "We don't serve your kind in here."
One of the yogurt cartons says back to him, "Why not? We're cultured!"
Why do people hate getting up early in Athens?
Because Dawn is tough on Greece.
"Did you hear the story about the peacock?"
"It's a beautiful tale."