Best Jokes

"Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a bridge."

The Doctor says, "What's come over you?"

The guy says, "Three cars and a truck!"

I asked my wife to buy a single thyme plant while she was at the nursery, because that's all the room I have left in my planter.

She came back with two plants because they were on sale.

I guess she two thymed me.

"Of course I'll attend your no alcohol, vegan Halloween party tonight…

I'll be dressed as the Invisible Man!"

I had a happy childhood.

My dad used to put me in tires and roll me down hills.

Those were Goodyears.