Best Jokes

I had a happy childhood.

My dad used to put me in tires and roll me down hills.

Those were Goodyears.

Did you hear about the guy who froze to death at the drive-in?

He went to see "Closed for the Winter".

Why don't cows become waitresses?

They hate being tipped.

Enticed by a television promotion, my wife ordered a popular exercise machine on a 30-day trial offer.

Two weeks later she decided not to buy it, and called UPS to arrange for pickup.

The next day the UPS driver arrived at our house. "Oh, no, not another one of these," he said. "All I've been doing is delivering these machines, then picking them up. The only person getting exercise from these things is me!"