Latest Jokes

$12.00 won 5 votes
 

Two old friends meet passing on the street one day. But one seemed hopeless, and almost on the verge of tears.

His friend asked, "What has the world done to you?"

The sad man said, "Let me tell you. Three weeks ago, an uncle died and left me forty thousand dollars."

"That's not bad."

"But you see, two weeks ago, a cousin I never even knew kicked the bucket, and left me eighty-five thousand free and clear."

"Sounds like you should be grateful..."

"You don't understand!" he interrupted. "Last week my great-aunt passed away. I inherited almost a quarter of a million."

Now the friend was really confused. "Then, why are you so sad?"

"This week... nothing!

5 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
Joke Won 4th Place won $12.00
posted by "HENNE" |
$9.00 won 3 votes

As I was admitted the hospital for a procedure, the clerk asked for my wrist, saying, "I'm going to give you a bracelet."

"Has it got rubies and diamonds?" I ask coyly.

"No," he said. "But it cost just as much."

3 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "HENNE" |
$5.00 won 3 votes

Two cab drivers met.

"Hey," asked one, "what's the idea of painting one side of your cab red and the other side blue?"

"Well," the other responded, "when I get into an accident, you should see how all the witnesses contradict each other."

3 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
Joke Won 10th Place won $5.00
posted by "wadejagz" |
3 votes
 

My pregnant daughter and her husband were checking out a new birth facility that was more like a spa. The birthing room had a hot tub, soft music, and candlelight.

"What do you think?" she said

He looked around. "Isn't this how we got here in the first place?"

3 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |