Latest Jokes
Favorite this joke 1. It's not funny to practice barking at 3 a.m.
2. It's wrong to back Grandma into a corner and guard her.
3. He shouldn't jump on your bed when he's sopping wet.
4. The cats have every right to be in the living room.
5. Barking at guests 10 minutes after they arrive is stupid
6. Getting up does NOT mean we are going for a walk
7. Just because I'm eating, doesn't mean you can.
8. If you look at me with those big soppy eyes, I'm not going to give in and feed you. NOT NOT NOT. Oh, ok, just this once.
9. No, it's my food... Oh alright then, just a small piece.
I never actually lose weight anymore.
Apparently, I just loan it out and it comes back with interest.
And lately, I have been getting great rates of return!
There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldn't find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him, "Great, so now you're cheating on me with a bald woman!"
The next night, when she didn't smell any perfume, she yelled again by saying, "She's not only bald, but she's too cheap to buy any perfume!"
How Buzz Aldrin introduces himself...
"Hi, I'm Buzz Aldrin, second man on the moon... Neil before me!"
Free Daily Joke