Latest Jokes

$25.00 won 11 votes

Little Johnny swallowed a coin and his mother was very much alarmed. She said to her husband, "Quick, quick send for the doctor!"

"No," replied Johnny's father. "Not the doctor, get the minister instead!"

"Oh no," exclaimed the mother. "You think Johnny is going to die?"

Father replied, "Oh, no, but our minister can get money out of anyone!"

11 votes

Joke Won 2nd Place won $25.00
posted by "Benjones" |
$10.00 won 7 votes

My horoscope said I was going to get my heart broken in 12 years time...

So I bought a puppy to cheer me up.

7 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
Joke Won 5th Place won $10.00
posted by "Gegg Smith" |
$50.00 won 10 votes

A lawyer's dog is having a great time running around the neighborhood unleashed — it heads directly to the butcher shop and pilfers a roast. 

The butcher heads over to the lawyer's office and asks, "If a dog running unleashed steals a piece of meat from my store, do I have a right to demand payment for the meat from the dog's owner?"

The lawyer replies, "Absolutely," and the butcher informs him that he owes him $18.50 because his unleashed dog just stole a roast from his shop. Speechless, the lawyer, goes on to write the butcher a check for the damages. 

A few days later, the butcher checks his mailbox and discovers an envelope from the lawyer. Inside the envelope is an invoice that read: "$75 due for a consultation."

10 votes

CATEGORY Lawyer Jokes
Joke Won 1st Place won $50.00
posted by "Benjones" |
$6.00 won 4 votes

A kindergarten teacher handed out a coloring page to her class. On it was a picture of a duck holding an umbrella.

The teacher told her class to color the duck in yellow and the umbrella green. Little Johnny, the class rebel, colored the duck in a bright fire-truck red.

After seeing this, the teacher asked him, "Little Johnny, how many times have you seen a red duck?"

Little Johnny replied, "The same number of times I've seen a duck holding an umbrella."

4 votes

Joke Won 9th Place won $6.00
posted by "wadejagz" |