Agent (to writer): I’ve got some good news and some bad news.
Writer: First tell me the good news.
Agent: Paramount Pictures just loved your script, absolutely ate it up.
Writer: That’s fantastic! And the bad news?
Agent: Paramount Pictures is the name of my dog.
The teacher heard Little Johnny use some serious language and was shocked. “Little Johnny, don’t you ever use language like that again, not near me, not ever. Where on earth did you learn that?”
“I got it from my dad, Miss,” replies Johnny.
“Well, your daddy should be ashamed. I hope you don’t know what all that even means?”
“Oh but I do,” says Johnny. “It means the car won’t start.”