Latest Jokes

4 votes

Agent (to writer): I’ve got some good news and some bad news.

Writer: First tell me the good news.

Agent: Paramount Pictures just loved your script, absolutely ate it up.

Writer: That’s fantastic! And the bad news?

Agent: Paramount Pictures is the name of my dog.

4 votes

posted by "iqannnylirod" |
$5.00 won 4 votes

Descartes walked into a bar and ordered a beer.

“Want another?” asked the bartender.

“I think not,” Descartes replied. Then he disappeared.

4 votes

Joke Won 10th Place won $5.00
posted by "Ryan Faidley" |
$9.00 won 8 votes

The teacher heard Little Johnny use some serious language and was shocked. “Little Johnny, don’t you ever use language like that again, not near me, not ever. Where on earth did you learn that?”

“I got it from my dad, Miss,” replies Johnny.

“Well, your daddy should be ashamed. I hope you don’t know what all that even means?”

“Oh but I do,” says Johnny. “It means the car won’t start.”

8 votes

Joke Won 6th Place won $9.00
posted by "Chloe2015" |
5 votes

A couple of guys were discussing the latest play showing in the theater.

"I saw the first act, but not the second."

"Why not?"

"I couldn't wait that long. It said on the program that the second act was two years later."

5 votes

posted by "Pshark1998" |