I was helping out with a tennis camp for little kids. At the beginning, the tennis pro running the event was talking about good sportsmanship.
He asked, "Can anyone tell me what a good sport is?"
This cute little 5-year-old raised his hand, got called on, and said, "Baseball."
Three lifelong buddies (one not so bright) were returning from a day of mountain biking in the Rocky Mountains. The not so bright buddy was in the back of the truck to better enjoy the mountains.
Heading around a rather tight turn, the truck veers off the cliff and plummets into a lake just below.
After just a few seconds, the two buddies in the truck cab break the surface with a gasp of air. To their horror, they realize their not so bright companion was still under water and they both immediately dove down to rescue him.
They pulled him to the surface and after a coughing fit asked him why he hadn't swam to the surface. With an annoyed look on his face, the not so bright buddy says, “I couldn't get the tailgate open!”
I was scrubbing the bulkhead on the USS Kitty Hawk one Sunday morning when the loud-speaker announced:
"Religious services. Maintain silence about the decks. Discontinue all unnecessary work."
An hour later, the opinion many of us held regarding our daily routine, was confirmed with this announcement:
"Resume all unnecessary work."
Two brothers were fast asleep in their room when the eldest heard a thud sound.
Eldest: What's that sound?
Youngest: Oh, it's just my t-shirt falling off my bed.
Eldest: T-shirt? Why was it so loud?
Youngest: Because I was still in it.