Latest Jokes
Favorite this joke Our mom needed a new mattress for her antique bed, so my brother Josh and I decided to buy her one as a gift. The problem was we weren't sure what to get because it was an odd size. Fortunately, my brother happened to be visiting my mother one day when I called home.
"Measure the bed frame before you leave," I told him.
"I don't have a tape measure."
"You can use a dollar bill," I suggested, "each one is six inches long."
"Can't," he replied after digging through his wallet, "I only have a ten."
Thanksgiving Day was approaching and the family had received a Thanksgiving card with a painting of a pilgrim family on their way to church.
Grandma showed the card to her small grandchildren, observing: "The Pilgrim children liked to go to church with their mothers and fathers."
"Oh yeah?" her young grandson replied. "Then why is their dad carrying that rifle?"
7th Place
won
$8.00
You know your old when you look at Santa Claus and think...
"Gosh, he looks so young!"
10th Place
won
$5.00
What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?
Stress is when the wife is pregnant,
Tension is when the girlfriend is pregnant.
Panic is when BOTH are pregnant!
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