Latest Jokes

$9.00 won 2 votes

A veterinarian surgeon had a bad day, but when he got home from tending to all the sick animals, his wife was waiting with a long cool drink and a romantic candle-lit dinner. After dinner, they had a few more drinks and went happily to bed.

At about 2:00 in the morning, the phone rang. "Is this the vet?" asked an elderly lady.

"Yes, it is," replied the vet, "Is this an emergency?"

"Well, sort of," said the elderly lady, "There's a whole bunch of cats on the roof outside making a terrible noise mating, and I can't get to sleep. What can I do about it?"

There was a sharp intake of breath from the vet, who then patiently replied, "Open the window and tell them they're wanted on the phone."

"Really?" said the elderly lady, "Will that stop them?"

"Well, it should," said the vet, "It stopped ME!"

2 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "Dan the Man 009" |
$50.00 won 3 votes

Why was 4 scared to ask out 5?

Because 4 was 2².

3 votes

posted by "Ryan Faidley" |
$50.00 won 3 votes

Once upon a time, there lived a king who was only 12 inches tall...

He was a terrible king, but he made a great ruler.

3 votes

posted by "Ryan Faidley" |
1 votes

The good thing about having a husband who never listens is being able to say: "I already told you that."

Whether you did or not, he'll never know the difference.

1 votes

CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "RMHawaii" |