Latest Jokes

$10.00 won 6 votes
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A man goes to the doctor with a swollen foot. After a careful examination, the doctor gives the man a pill big enough to choke a horse.

"I'll be right back with some water," the doctor tells him.

The doctor has been gone a while and the man loses patience. He hobbles out to the drinking fountain, forces the pill down his throat and gobbles down water until the pill clears his throat. He hobbles back into the examining room.

Just then the doctor comes back with a bucket of warm water, "Okay, after the tablet dissolves, soak that foot for about 20 minutes."

6 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
Joke Won 5th Place won $10.00
posted by "HENNE" |
$7.00 won 9 votes

The aquarium shop where I work has been in business for more than 20 years. One Sunday a customer called wanting to buy a larger aquarium. "And by the way, I’ve spent a lot of money at your store over the years," he said. "I think I should get a discount."

"Only our owner can give a discount," I explained, "and he won’t be in until tomorrow."

When the customer said that he’d come in the next day, I asked him if there was anything else I could help him with.

"Sure," he said. "Where is your store located?"

9 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
Joke Won 8th Place won $7.00
posted by "Bhanu Sandesh" |
6 votes

My friend is notorious for waiting until the needle is on empty before filling his gas tank. Finally his car died on him, and we had to push it to the nearest filling station. After my friend finished pumping gas, the attendant asked if he had learned anything.

“Yeah,” my friend muttered, “I learned I have a 15-gallon tank.”

6 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "Heaven" |
7 votes

After shopping at a busy store, another woman and I happened to leave at the same time, only to be faced with the daunting task of finding our cars in the crowded parking lot. Just then my car horn beeped, and I was able to locate my vehicle easily.

“Wow,” the woman said. “I sure could use a gadget like that to help me find my car.”

“Actually,” I replied, “that’s my husband.”

7 votes

posted by "Bhanu Sandesh" |