Best Jokes

First Martian: That girl over there rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?

Second Martian: If you were a real gentleman, you'd pick them and roll them back to her!

What is the soft mushy stuff between a shark's teeth?

Slow swimmers.

I just started a support group where no one sees or hears each other.

I don't know how many members there are because I don't hear or see any of them.

A Native American gentleman was at the local home improvement store purchasing a few bags of gardening soil. As he waited in line to pay for his bags of dirt, a guy behind him spoke to him. "You gonna do some planting?"

The Native American man turned to him and, with a very serious face, said, "No, I am buying my land back one bag at a time and I am getting a receipt this time."

The shocked look on the guy's face was priceless.