Latest Jokes

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PRENATAL: when your life was still somewhat your own.

PUDDLE: a small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.

SHOW OFF: a child who is more talented than yours.

STERILIZE: what you do to your first baby’s pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby’s pacifier by blowing on it.

TOP BUNK: where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.

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CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
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GRANDPARENTS: the people who think your children are wonderful even though they are sure you are not raising them right.

HEARSAY: what toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.

IMPREGNABLE: a women whose memory of labor is still vivid.

INDEPENDENT: how we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.

OW: the first word spoken by children with older siblings.

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CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
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Baloney \ba-lo’-ne\: Where some hemlines fall.

Banquet \bang’-kwit\: Why the vocalist had no instrumentalists.

Bernadette \burn’-a-det\: The act of torching a mortgage.

Boomerang \boo’-me-rang\: What’s on top of the Ghost Cream Pie.

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posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |
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My paper got ripped earlier...

I'm still torn up about it!

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CATEGORY Puns
posted by "pinkgalaxy3" |