A politician visited a remote little rural village and asked the inhabitants what the government could do for them.
“We have two big needs,” said the village headman. “First, we have a hospital but no doctor.”
The politician whipped out his cellphone, spoke for a while and then said, “I have sorted it out. A doctor will arrive here tomorrow. What is your other need?”
“We have no cellphone reception at all in our village.”
The pastor of a local church was visited by a man evidently worse for liquor, and a young lady.
She said to the minister, "Please, sir, we've come to be married."
"I can't marry you with this man in this condition," said the clergyman. "Besides haven't you been here twice before, and haven't I told you the same thing?"
Yes, sir, you have," replied the lady. "But when he isn't drunk, I can't get him to come with me, sir."